It’s taking me longer to do finish what I started.
I feel like how I used to when I would set out to make something as a kid and had a class project. I would watch everyone else set everything up and just do it, no questions asked.
I would overthink, plot out what I wanted to make, make it, and then feel bad that it didn’t look the way I thought it should in my head. I would imagine that the garbage everyone else made came out exactly as they wanted it, no mistakes.
I’m the only person capable of making mistakes.
At least that’s what I used to think. Well, maybe ‘used to’ is no longer the correct turn of phrase.
I think this is mainly the problem I’m experiencing now.
Continue reading “Soon”
Saying that you’re going to do something is often completely the opposite of actually doing it.
I think I feel good that I’ve mostly kept up with writing down things that I think about, although I do miss a few days here and there. I feel a bit less like my life is falling apart when I do, although I still feel kinda like the floor is crumbling underneath me when I’m out at work, or doing anything uncomfortable, but, baby steps.
My husband actually streamed again yesterday, and he had a lot of fun. I think he finally realized that part of being happy is just saying the hell with it and doing what you want to do instead of thinking about doing it.
Continue reading “Progress”